just had a very interesting dream.

i was working for a company that had office space in the old AFA offices (my father's business). During the dream, I went to work everyday and did my job. People appreciated my contribution, but there was that unspoken non-personal business block in every conversation. People were friendly but not real.

While walking around the office, I often imagined what it looked like in the AFA days. I'd peer into someone's private office, just to see what their room looked like now. The feeling of loss was substantial. During most of the workday, I mourned the business that once existed there.

One day, I started a conversation with the guy I knew the best, the one in the office next to mine. I asked, "Hey did I tell you that my dad's business was once here?" He said yes, again friendly but not real. I persisted. I talked about AFA and what his office used to be. We started to walk around. I was emboldened, even though I knew he wasn't really interested.

We walked back into an area I hadn't visited yet ... in the dream, it was my father's old office (of course dreams are never exact, but I knew where I was). I told the guy that this was the place my dad worked. We looked around. I was surprised to find old furniture still there from the Alpine house. I wondered aloud how it could have possibly been missed, and what to do with it now.

We walked around outside. There was a walkway that I pointed to and said, "I don't really remember that, but I remember weeding it." The guy smiled, but his frustration showed through. He was through with the personal tour. He went back to work.

After this, I walked aimlessly, imagining AFA at its prime. Having to work in an impersonal environment on the site of the old AFA was just too much. I walked past some new sales recruits setting up their offices and thought "What do they know?" I walked down the hallway and thought, "Why am I here?"

When I woke up, it was clear. I'll always be haunted by AFA. No matter where I work, it'll always be "the office". It's who I am.